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IT MUST BE TRUE
Goldenvale Standardizes Awards
[08/20/2003] [News]

According to the Goldenvale Althing of August 16th, Orders of the Spider and Orders of the Bard no longer exist. Spiders were formerly granted for doing work online and have been changed to Roses, whereas Bards, which were for singing, have been changed to Dragons. Anyone holding these orders will have them converted to the appropriate award.

The Althing also voted to make cloth covers optional on weapons. Most other kingdoms require some sort of cloth cover due to the danger posed by a duct-tape cover.

Politics was also voted on by the Althing, as Goldenvale unanimously declared that candidates for office must wear specialized sock hats. People running for monarch must wear pink sock hats, regent candidates must wear polka dot sock hats, and contendors for champion must wear paisly sock hats. Prime Ministers are required to wear sock hats made from Wal-Mart smiley face fabric.

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